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Top 10 Monkeys
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September 14, 2001 - Tim "Ripe Banana" Wann (Columnist)
In a non-opposable thumb salute to our
favorite mammal.... DaddyMonkey presents our Top
10 Monkeys.
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10. Lancelot Link:
Secret Chimp
He talks like Humphrey Bogart, he's a secret agent, and he's a chimp... What's not to love there?! The star of this late 60's sitcom was yet another show that featured an animal with human voice overdubs... but here's the catch... this show starred PRIMATES! So it is automatically better than Mr. Ed, and the rest of those talking chumps from the animal kingdom.
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9. Blip
Most of you know Space Ghost Coast to Coast on the Cartoon Network... but only the "over twenty somethings" will probably remember the original Hanna Barbara cartoon Space Ghost that was a Saturday morning specialty back in the day. Space Ghost had two teen sidekicks, Jan and Jace, who in turn had a cool little monkey named Blip. Look at him... he has a little space suit, a black mask, and cool hair. He rocks.
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8. Chim Chim
The slightly brain damaged chimp from classic 70's cartoon, Speed Racer, was no looker... but he was one bad mutha... SHUT YOUR MOUTH! I'm only talkin' bout Chim Chim. I can dig it! He was best pal to Speed's younger brother Spritle. They hid in the trunk of the Mach 5 to aid Speed and Trixie in their adventures... oh, and eat lots of candy too. Monkey + Striped Beanie + Candy = Cartoon Gold.
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7. Grape Ape
He's huge, he's purple, he's an ape. Hanna Barbara's cartoon creation, Grape Ape, was a gentle giant and sidekick to Beegily Beagley. Sort of like the Incredible Hulk, but with opposite colors and personality. People were scared of him because of his size and strength, but he wouldn't hurt a fly. Just sits on top of Beagley's van, belching out his name, rolling down da street... laid back... with his mind on his bananas, and his bananas on his mind.
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6.
Marcel
Ross from TV sitcom Friends gets a pet monkey, and suddenly a star is born. He is sexually frustrated, swallows Scrabble pieces, and can change the television audio from English to Spanish faster than a speeding Quadruped. Nothing boosts rating more than hot chicks wearing no bra under their tight shirts... and a token monkey. No wonder Friends is so popular!
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5. Abu
Disney's Aladdin was non stop humor with the voice talents of Robin Williams as The Genie. But let's not forget the movie's 2 ft. high, unsung hero with the purple fez hat, Abu. One of the few Disney animals that doesn't speak perfect English... but his gestures, expressions, and squeaks make him one of the most entertaining monkeys to grace the silver screen.
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4. Dr. Zaius
Yeah, he's a bad-guy, but really he's just tryin to keep things running smoothly. This guy is in charge of the future for crying out loud. When Chuck Heston is hurled through time, Dr. Zaius was there to tell him that as a human, he was inferior to apes and incapable of intelligent thought. He had a whole planet of primates convinced that man was below them on the evolutionary scale. No small feat for a damn dirty ape! Props Dr. Z!
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3. Donkey Kong
Nintendo's head primate made his first appearance in the arcades around 1981, and has since been the un-disputed king of video game monkeys. He took a small vacation from the game scene in the late 80's, but busted back with a vengeance in the 90's and beyond with many top notch Gameboy, SNES, and N64 titles that brought back this loveable barrel throwing lug, as well as his family!
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2. King Kong
Probably the most famous of all screen gorillas, Kong has reached legendary status. He's known world wide, and is truly an icon. Who cares if there have been several really bad remakes and sequels of the classic horror flick... that doesn't seem to diminish his legacy. He climbs buildings, smashes helicopters.... He's big, bad, and lusts after human ladies. GO KONG! IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY...
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1. Curious George
DaddyMonkey's #1 Monkey is the adorable Curious George. Anyone who hasn't grown up reading the antics of this little guy was deprived! George gets into all kinds of trouble... well, because he's curious. But his owner, The Man in the Yellow Hat is always there to help him out. Yup, he's a handsome little dude with an appetite for problem solving, and his adventures will bless children's book collections for generations to come. Congrats George, you are our favorite monkey of all time!
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Up and Coming
Monkeys (Honorable Mention)
Keep your eyes on these young primate upstarts... they are destined for monkey greatness.
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1. Bad Andy (Domino's Pizza)
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2. Mojo Jojo (Powerpuff Girls)
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3. Monkey (Dexter's Lab)
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4. Monkeybone (20th Century Fox Film)
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5. Joe Cottone (Inspirado for this site)
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Opinions, we all have them. Our's is not the same as yours. Sometimes it is, sometimes it isn't. The point is, if you don't agree fine. If you do agree, even better. Just realize this: everything said on these pages, is an opinion, and should be taken as such. If you are offended by what is said, just don't come back. Please do not resort to childish flaming or spamming of our message board or monk.e.mail address below, but do feel free to drop us a line with any intelligent comments you may have.
Thanks,
Brad & Tim. |
DMLives@gmail.com
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