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Hellboy II: The Golden Army Movie Review
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July 9, 2008 - Brad "Sapien" Smoley (Columnist)
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No, I said "get the BIG gun." |
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There's something I really like about Hellboy. I'll grant that the first film wasn't great, but it wasn't awful. There's a lot of potential there. Which is why Hellboy II: The Golden Army was one of the movies I was looking forward to most this summer. The first Hellboy focused a lot on the angsty, mysterious nature of the paranormal world. The "things that go bump in the night" were largely kept hidden in shadows and made you think there was a subtle secret world hiding just behind our own, but always tethered directly to our reality. Its Lovecraftian themes were ominous and gritty. Hellboy II pretty much smashes all of that to the ground with a big giant stone gauntlet and then puts its cigar out on its face.
Where the first Hellboy film took cues from the horror genre, Hellboy II feels much more like fantasy. Subtle hints of the paranormal are gone in favor of in-your-face action and blatant adventure. They don't bother traipsing around the edge of the supernatural waters, they jump right in with both feet and make a big splash. If you're into big splashes, you just might have some fun with Hellboy II.
You see, there's a world of fairies and trolls and elves and demons that's a lot more pervasive than we ever knew. It isn't the exception, it's the rule. We as humans are simply too blind to see it. In ancient times, the line wasn't so blurred and humans interacted with elves and goblins. In fact, they often warred with them. So much so that the immortal king of the elves enlisted goblins to create a terrible, indestructible clockwork Golden Army to destroy his enemies. Fortunately for us humans, he saw the error of his ways and decided to form a truce with mankind. The magical crown that controlled the army was broken into 3 pieces and man and elf lived in peace. The prince of the elves didn't like this so he vowed to return and kick the humans' asses with the Golden Army some day.
Well, that day is here. Luckily for us, the U.S. government has contingencies for such things. Enter Hellboy and friends. From that jumping-off point, del Toro pretty much goes nuts. He transforms creator Mike Mignola's Hellboy universe into something much more grand and epic than it was before.
[continued below trailer]
Part of that grandness comes from del Toro's love of creatures. He totally has a "monstergasm" in this movie and frankly, it was amazingly awesome. He got to spread his creative wings and fly... even if those wings were covered in eyeballs and razor sharp feathers. If he had an opportunity to actually physically create a creature or effect, he took that opportunity and reveled in it. That sort of attention and craftsmanship makes you really believe in the world he's presenting to you. There is a fair amount of CGI, but only when absolutely necessary. From start to finish, the visuals in the film are nothing short of breathtaking.
This is director Guillermo del Toro's third comic-book-to-film adaptation and probably his strongest to date. Blade 2 suffered from a case of the ho-hums (at least for me) and the original Hellboy was also flawed. But del Toro took the source material for this film and really squeezed everything he could out of it and made it look beautiful and exciting to boot.
The Hobbit is in good hands. Breathe easy, my friends.
Del Toro also managed to really amp up the action in this installment. There were several very imaginative action sequences in Hellboy II that really make the film worth while... especially if you aren't a comic book fan and are just looking for a cool adventure movie to pass the time. If you ARE a comic book fan, well, there's just that much more for you to geek out over.
My main concern going in to the movie was that it wasn't going to feel "fun". The first Hellboy film was a little dreary and repetitive, but "The Golden Army" didn't disappoint me. There's a lot more tongue-in-cheek humor, a lot more fun character moments, and a greater overall feeling of adventure this time out.
The performances were decent enough, but Selma Blair has never done anything for me. She sleepwalks through this and nearly every other role I've ever seen her in. Perlman is fun as Hellboy and Doug Jones owns the role of Abe Sapien... plus he actually gets to do the voice this time.
My major complaints really stem from a storytelling standpoint more than anything else. There are some glaring pacing issues. Some things that needed dwelling upon were glossed over and some things that should have been quick and frivolous seemed to drag on. The movie ends up feeling a bit uneven in sections but it more than makes up for it by barraging you with imaginative sequences and set pieces. It really takes about a half hour to really get going, but once it does, it's worth the price of admission.
The movie is fun. It isn't a masterpiece like Pan's Labyrinth, but it's fun. That's the bottom line. And whether you're into the teenage-boy-in-a-demon-man's body or not, there should be plenty here to satisfy your summer popcorn chomping cravings for at least a couple of hours.
 7/10
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Hellboy II:
The Golden Army
Starring:
Ron Perlman
Selma Blair
Jeffrey Tambor
Doug Jones
Seth MacFarlane
Directed by:
Guillermo del Toro
Written by:
Guillermo del Toro
Mike Mignola
Rated: PG-13
Sci-fi Action
Violence
Language
Troll Boobs
Briefly, how we rate the movies we see...
| 10 |
_Perfect
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| 9 |
_Excellent
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| 8 |
_Great
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| 7 |
_Very Good
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| 6 |
_Good
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| 5 |
_Not Bad
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| 4 |
_Not Good
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| 3 |
_Pretty Bad
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| 2 |
_Really Bad
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| 1 |
_Suck Ass
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| 0 |
_Feces on Film
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